First World Problems/ B*tch it out
You know what? People are in general: rude, obnoxious, undignified, ignorant and dumb.
I'm in a bad mood today, so what better than to drag you all down with me by reminding you of the stupid things people do. My favourite article in Cosmo (which is my trashy read when I have time--currently have a few months piled up, I'm so far behind), used to be the B*tch it out! (do they even still have this?)....Here is my version.
-Dear people in the elevator. If you're going to be this close to me, and you know you haven't brushed your teeth in about 20 years, or had a horrible combo of cigarettes, coffee and cat crap for breakfast, please hold your breath until you exit. I do not want to feel like an asshole for gagging because you stink so bad.
- Dear drivers. We live in Canada. Yes, it snows. No, that is not a reason to drive like a complete moron. Yes, it freezes rain also--same applies here. But also, for the LOVE OF GOD, brush off and scrape your car. I don't feel like getting side swiped because you don't know the logistics of how a snow brush works. And if you can't be bothered to brush off the foot of powdery snow from the roof of your car so that it doesn't create a constant "snow storm" effect in front of me, then stay the hell home.
- Dear people of Costco. If you could stop stopping in the middle of aisles to chat or stare like an idiot into the abyss, that'd be greaaaat.
- Dear people of Walmart: Deoderant. Also, stay the hell out of the 12 items or less line with your cart FULL of groceries.
- Dear person bagging my groceries: just because I don't "want my meat separate" doesn't mean you should proceed to pile every possible item in the same bag. I don't mind the extra 5 cents, really. No bag should exceed 5 lbs.
- Dear young adolescent boy working at shoppers drug mart. Women buy tampons and pads. Stop blushing and fumbling over them,and shove those puppies into a bag so I can get home and stuff my face with the reeses peanut butter cups I also bought.
- Dear girl at the paint counter: you don't need to use a hair dryer from 1982 to dry the little dot of paint you put on the top of the can. I just want to stop making small talk, and pay the ridiculous $55 to paint the worlds smallest bathroom.
- Dear instruction manual writers. Less words, more pictures.
- Dear frozen lasagna instruction writers...add 10-15 minutes. My cheese was still cold.
- Dear people that creep by my house or walk their dogs and stare in my windows. I like lights on in my house, and I understand my front door is almost all window, and I would also stare...but can you please not be so obvious about it? It makes me want to put bars on all the windows.
- Dear ice. Please stop cracking on my roof. It ALMOST makes me pee a little everytime I hear the pop.
- Dear Sandals Resorts. Please stop advertising on tv. I really want to go everytime I see your commercials, and that's not for a few more months. kthxbai.
- Dear Post office: why do stamps need to be 1/4 of the size of the envelopes? I just bought some the other day and they are seriously almost the size of my small post it's at work. HUGE, I tell ya.
- Dear people in the car next to me. Yes I see you picking your nose, checking your teeth in the mirror, licking your hand to flatten your frizz, make the stupid face you make when you're really digging a song. Learn to do these things NOT in bumper to bumper traffic or at a stop light like the rest of the people in the world.
- Dear Bed Bath and Beyond..why must your website be so fun to shop on, but your actual store be so boring and hard to manoeuvre around?
- Dear Garett, mommy must love you because she just agreed to pay $4.75 PER cookie for your birthday. (seriously though...note to my future self: never special order cookies)
...I think that's it. In order to keep my head from exploding, I sometimes need to let these things out. Usually it's while I talk to Tyler, but I am far to lazy right now to talk out loud ( have you ever been THAT lazy before? lol).
If you are my facebook friend, you will notice I posted pictures of my finished, brand spanking new powder room. I promise to take some actual good pictures with a camera that isn't my phone and do a post on that too....Garett's room, and powder room. You can hold me to that..someday. haha
Happy Tuesday!
I'm in a bad mood today, so what better than to drag you all down with me by reminding you of the stupid things people do. My favourite article in Cosmo (which is my trashy read when I have time--currently have a few months piled up, I'm so far behind), used to be the B*tch it out! (do they even still have this?)....Here is my version.
-Dear people in the elevator. If you're going to be this close to me, and you know you haven't brushed your teeth in about 20 years, or had a horrible combo of cigarettes, coffee and cat crap for breakfast, please hold your breath until you exit. I do not want to feel like an asshole for gagging because you stink so bad.
- Dear drivers. We live in Canada. Yes, it snows. No, that is not a reason to drive like a complete moron. Yes, it freezes rain also--same applies here. But also, for the LOVE OF GOD, brush off and scrape your car. I don't feel like getting side swiped because you don't know the logistics of how a snow brush works. And if you can't be bothered to brush off the foot of powdery snow from the roof of your car so that it doesn't create a constant "snow storm" effect in front of me, then stay the hell home.
- Dear people of Costco. If you could stop stopping in the middle of aisles to chat or stare like an idiot into the abyss, that'd be greaaaat.
- Dear people of Walmart: Deoderant. Also, stay the hell out of the 12 items or less line with your cart FULL of groceries.
- Dear person bagging my groceries: just because I don't "want my meat separate" doesn't mean you should proceed to pile every possible item in the same bag. I don't mind the extra 5 cents, really. No bag should exceed 5 lbs.
- Dear young adolescent boy working at shoppers drug mart. Women buy tampons and pads. Stop blushing and fumbling over them,and shove those puppies into a bag so I can get home and stuff my face with the reeses peanut butter cups I also bought.
- Dear girl at the paint counter: you don't need to use a hair dryer from 1982 to dry the little dot of paint you put on the top of the can. I just want to stop making small talk, and pay the ridiculous $55 to paint the worlds smallest bathroom.
- Dear instruction manual writers. Less words, more pictures.
- Dear frozen lasagna instruction writers...add 10-15 minutes. My cheese was still cold.
- Dear people that creep by my house or walk their dogs and stare in my windows. I like lights on in my house, and I understand my front door is almost all window, and I would also stare...but can you please not be so obvious about it? It makes me want to put bars on all the windows.
- Dear ice. Please stop cracking on my roof. It ALMOST makes me pee a little everytime I hear the pop.
- Dear Sandals Resorts. Please stop advertising on tv. I really want to go everytime I see your commercials, and that's not for a few more months. kthxbai.
- Dear Post office: why do stamps need to be 1/4 of the size of the envelopes? I just bought some the other day and they are seriously almost the size of my small post it's at work. HUGE, I tell ya.
- Dear people in the car next to me. Yes I see you picking your nose, checking your teeth in the mirror, licking your hand to flatten your frizz, make the stupid face you make when you're really digging a song. Learn to do these things NOT in bumper to bumper traffic or at a stop light like the rest of the people in the world.
- Dear Bed Bath and Beyond..why must your website be so fun to shop on, but your actual store be so boring and hard to manoeuvre around?
- Dear Garett, mommy must love you because she just agreed to pay $4.75 PER cookie for your birthday. (seriously though...note to my future self: never special order cookies)
...I think that's it. In order to keep my head from exploding, I sometimes need to let these things out. Usually it's while I talk to Tyler, but I am far to lazy right now to talk out loud ( have you ever been THAT lazy before? lol).
If you are my facebook friend, you will notice I posted pictures of my finished, brand spanking new powder room. I promise to take some actual good pictures with a camera that isn't my phone and do a post on that too....Garett's room, and powder room. You can hold me to that..someday. haha
Happy Tuesday!
i feel for you on each and every one of those points - go home to your boy and hopefully a better day tomorrow is in store!
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